General election 2019

I challenged Boris Johnson at the 2019 General Election, where I received a glorious 69 votes from the great British public. Yes, that’s right, I experienced a 69 with Boris in a London sports hall at 4am on Friday the 13th. I’d love to say that’s a first, but with Boris you just can’t be sure.

my policies included:

✔ expansion in recycling except Hollywood movie plots

✔ David Attenborough—or a statue of him—to be on the fourth plinth at Trafalgar Square

✔ Piers Morgan to be zero emissions by 2030

✔ Jacob Rees-Mogg to be prorogued

✔ Stop selling arms to repressive regimes. buy Sigma IX lasers from Count Binface